The Artwork of Rev Fanoire Siphuncle

Here, presented here, is the (here) artwork of the Reverend Fanoire Siphuncle, famed polymath and inventor. In 1871 (and 1983) the Reverend embarked on his most ambitious project to date in 1983. Entitled 'Things That Can Happen' it was intended to be a demonstration of possible occurrences and contained ten paintings, differing in content but following the theme. Hailed as a masterpiece by Mr Patel on the corner word reached the London Galleries but they were too late. In a fit of self-consciousness the Reverend hid the paintings, never to be seen again until they were seen again. Now they can be seen again.
Unfortunately I have found the originals difficult to photograph because they are in the dark. I therefore present the ten titles here. If anyone would like to see them with a view to purchasing the "job lot" for an agreed sum and they can see in the dark then PM me and you can come and see some of the things and look at them and see them in the dark.

1. Overture - a pig eating sun lotion and crying
2. A wellington boot blocking a butcher's path (with sunset)
3. St Paul's cathedral asking for a pay rise from a man dressed as the Queen
4. One cigarette (not two cigarettes) and a slight spillage
5. Three unnaturally tall gentlemen in gowns with moustaches considering an unusual spectacle at lunchtime
6. The village idiot having covered himself in butter realises his cowboy suit is still too tight
7. A pencil, gripped firmly by an ape as he falls from his motorscooter
8. Poseidon reaches out from the sea and places a half-sucked Werther's original in a topless bathers purse during a thunderstorm
9. A boxing contest between a homeless gentleman and powerful gravitational forces
10. Three scotch eggs carefully placed with World War II in the background

Please look at the descriptions and see if you can see whether you would like to see them.
These of course are not the only paintings that were created by the Rev. This is just his masterpiece which is brilliant. In the rest of this article I will be looking at paintings he did that can be seen (since they are not in the dark). Look at them too. But they are not for sale. I don't know where they are.



Here is one of his famous paintings entitled Three Boys Waiting For Things That Can Happen. Can you see the third boy?

Another one from the same period. Called "Observation time" it was won in a bet by Sir Gerald Throughputt and never seen again. But it can be seen here.

Apparently the boy in the background belonged to the Reverend but there is no record of him ever having been. It's a mystery.




This is called "One of a Woman".

There are no strings on her violin. This is because the painting was made shortly before the invention of strings.

She is supposed to be a miniature woman but the Rev was so enthralled and engrossed in his vision that he forgot to show a sense of scale. The woman is thought to be looking at a man who is towering above her brandishing a pork chop, or so the Rev claims in his obituary.



This last one for today is an early attempt at a Painting of an Incident.

 The Rev was so unhappy with it that he wrote a rival painter's name in the corner. However, the true source was revealed when someone asked if he had painted it and he said, "Yes.".

Well I hope you enjoyed reading and seeing about the Rev Fanoire Siphuncle's paintings. Better luck next time.